Story by Benzone50
Written by Benzone50 and Jordan Krumbine

Character A - the writer with a penchant for research
Character B -
Character C - a little slow.

TITLES

A
I am so out of ideas right now and I have to admit, it is REALLY getting me down.

C
(inquisitive)
Out of ideas for what?

A
(sighs)
The next script I’m writing.

B
Well, if you’re out of ideas, how are you writing a script?

A
That’s the whole point!  I’m not writing anything!

C
You know, sometimes you have to wade through a lot of nothing before you get to SOMETHING.

A
Oh, I’ve GOT something.  I keep coming up with different topics and then I start writing a conversation, but suddenly the characters don’t have anything to say to each other!

B
The characters you’re WRITING don’t have anything to say about a topic of conversation?

A
(frustrated)
It’s like they magically have no opinion about anything!

B
How do you mean?

A
Okay, here’s an example.  The other day I started a script based on the premise of 2G cell phone owners vs 3G cell phone owners.

B
Ah, technology!  Everybody has an opinion about that!

A
Right!  Well, the script got to the point where the 2G owners realized that the 3Gers were total snobs.  And then they stopped talking to each other!

C
So, what?  You wrote yourself into a corner?!

B
(dismissively)
All you needed to do was bring in a 4G character to get them talking again.  Easy-peasy.

A
.... that is brilliant.  Why the hell didn’t I think of that?  Better yet, where were YOU when I was trying to write these scripts in the first place?!

B
Right here where I always am.  You know I have no life outside of my computer screen.

C
Wait, “scripts”?  As in plural?  What were the other scripts about?

A
One was about these new “memristors” that promise to change the future of electronics.

C
And you fell flat on writing that one, too?

A
I fell like a bag of wet cement.

B
You know you can skype me anytime, right? Wait, what’s a memristor?

A
A memristor was produced by HP together with Hynix, the worlds second largest memory chip maker. They say these little babies have the potential for exponentially greater storage capacities while requiring less energy and space than current flash media.

C
Uh--

A
And get this: they can even be deployed on the PROCESSOR.

C
(Out of his/her depth)
Wow, okay, that’s definitely, uh, very technical.

B
So we could cram a truck load of information into something the size of a twinkie.

A
No, we can already do that with today’s technology.  A twinkie is a terrible size reference because what we’re talking about would be ridiculously small.  They’re even saying that these memristors are the “missing link” in electronics.

C
Oh, so it’s kinda like the “Story of O“, re-written for the future.

B
(blatant confusion, a little surprised)
.....

A
(also very confused)
......

C
Oh, come on!  You’ve never heard of the Story of O?

B
I have no idea what you’re talking about.

C
It’s an animated film.  It was made in the 80’s and it told the story of man as far back as cavemen.  The missing link is named “O” and he grows up with a dinosaur.  They both were rejected by their mothers.

B
(more awkward confusion)
.......

A
(awkward confusion)
.......

A
Okay.  I believe you?

C
(Quoting a line from said movie.  Imitating how you would perceive a dragon would sound after catching a man drinking his dragon food)
That’s not water, Asshole! That’s Dragon food. And just for looking at it, I'm going to crisp you!

B
(more awkward confusion)
.......

A
(awkward confusion)
.......

C
Really?  Nothing?

A
(opens mouth to say something, then thinks better of it)
.....

C
(dejected)
Nevermind.

A
Okay.  So, uh, anyway, the bottom line is that memristors replace the actions of billions of transistors that make up a modern processor.

C
You mean like an old transistor radio?

A
What?  Really?

B
Yes, it’s something like that, but much smaller, here in the 21st century, my little caveman friend.

A
Dude, trying to explain this is an exercise in futility. Anyway there was one other script I began writing about bumblebees in the UK that are at risk of becoming extinct because of inbreeding.

B
Huh.  Now that sounds interesting.

A
Yeah I thought so, too. I likened the road to extinction of these bumblebees to the royal family, in that there is a lack of genetic diversity which then makes them susceptible to parasites, twitches, prone to pollen poisoning-like alcoholism in humans, etcetera, etcetera.

C
What?  Bees with twitches and alcohol problems?!

B
(confused)
.....?

A
Anyway I got way too caught up in all the detail to ever make the script interesting.

B
Well, if you want my opinion, scrap it all and just write a script about all of this.  The Missing Link versus you and the sheer confusion that follows from all this talk about information and technology.

A
(offended)
Are you serious?  That’s a terrible idea.  Worst thing I’ve ever heard.

C
Pfft.  That’s a great idea!  I’ve been recording this whole chat and I’m gonna upload it to YouTube and get millions of hits and become super famous!  Missing Link OUT!
(signs off)

A
(awkward confused)
.....

B
...... this whole conversation was recorded.

A
You weren’t serious about it being a good idea, were you?

B
No, I think it’s a great idea.

A
.... there’s no way it’ll get a million views, right?

B
It WAS a pretty funny chat.

A
I put all this work and research into my scripts and that-that-that NEANDERTHAL is gonna just post a recording of a live chat!

B
With all of your ideas in it, don’t forget that part!

A
(despondent)
I’ll never write again.

B
Oh, don’t say that.

Character A drops head to desk with a thud.

B
Was that the bag of wet cement again?

A
(long drawn out moan)
Uuuuuuuuuuh!

END



(Adlibbing by all characters is encouraged. I see the adlibbing being a bonus and a great tool for people to sink themselves into their prospective characters and bring much more to the table, including great out-takes, LOL!)


Links
Couldnt find the HP link I read info from.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-11199779 inbred bumblebees
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7v6J6TrzgFI Missing link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-7Hq1IKuK2o Missing link



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