Color me baffled.
Look, I understand if your world view swings far left or if it swings far right or if it meanders somewhere down the middle ... but to spew forth mutually idiotic opinions from both extremes in practically the same breath, while maintaining utmost and total conviction in and of these statements, well, that's just plain baffling.
And yes, once again, I find myself referring to my brother. What can I say, after the climax of controversery we stirred up in our past conversations (by we I mean me and you, the good people of Krumbination) I thought it prudent to take a break--plus, I had no desire to actually give my brother any more attention than he clearly doesn't deserve.
But this was too much.
Jason insists on writing a weekly column rooted in the Christian faith. Or something like the Christian faith. I suppose that's alway open to interpretation, the specific definition of "Christian faith", that is. Interestingly enough--and this is probably why I ended up writing this in the first place--I'm reading a good book called "The Year of Living Biblically" (by AJ Jacobs and recommended by Obsquatch in his YouTube book club). I'm only about seventy pages into the book, but it's already very good and very engaging. Each part of each month, the author opens with a rule that is laid down in the bible. The author's goal is to follow those rules as literally as possible.
There's a lot of rules.
I mention this book because Jason, my brother, apparently is fond of citing the bible when it suits him. And, well, he's just not that bright. In one article he's talking about how God destroyed mankind--twice over--exclusively because of gay people and that homosexuality is a sin for which you will burn in hell and he cites nothing short of about three hundred and eighty-six verses in the bible to backup these claims. (Okay, that last part was exaggerated ... SLIGHTLY. Seriously, this is coming from the guy who wrote a gay character into a prominent role in his first "novel", and who loves to talk and joke about gays.) In the second breath (er, article) he's going on about how the billionaires of the world need to stop with all the senseless giving to charities and good causes and supporting the less deserving and just fucking trust the big man upstairs for once in their goddamned pitiful lives.
Never once in this second breath, so close to that first one with all the scriptures in it, does he ever think to turn to the bible. Never once does he recall the single greatest hallmark of organized church and--quite possibly--the most recited, God-given, biblical rule in all of existence.
You know, to tithe. To give away part of your income. In fact, the bible is pretty damn specific: you're to give away ten percent (Genesis 14:19, 28:20-22). Leviticus 27:32 says that every tenth animal is the Lord's. Deuteronomy 14:22-29 says to set aside a tenth to learn to revere God.
And completely ignoring how obvious this Christian rule is, and even assuming you're a complete idiot about all things biblical, a quick Google search reveals 100 bible verses that encourage generosity.
Skip the tithing and skip forward to the New Testament and the WHOLE FRIKKEN BOOK is about humbling yourself and helping those less fortunate. Well, maybe not the whole thing. I'm pretty much the farthest thing from a bible scholar you'll ever find, but I still know how to use Google. We've got Matthew 25:35-40 which says that helping the least of the brethren is helping Jesus and Mark 12:41-44 talks of rich people giving and the widow's mite. And if you even want to be selfish in your Godliness, Luke 6:38 affirms that if you give, God will see that others give to you.
That's a hell of a lot of scripture talking about a hell of a lot of giving. And I only scratched the surface.
I've been stewing on these thoughts for a few hours and have been searching for the proverbial punchline to this story (as if it even needed one) and I've finally settled on this: Jason's own words.
But first, a quick recap.
As always, my point in these "responses" to my brother's blogs is simply entertainment. My own, mainly, of which I am only too eager to share with you. Underneath the poking and prodding and laughing, however, my goal is to shine a bright light on the sheer idiocy that he manages to come up with ... and maybe--just MAYBE--cause him a moment's pause before he publishes his next article, Christian-themed or otherwise.
Straight from said article, unedited:
"... at the end of the end day, what have they accomplished with their 70 Billion Dollars worth of donations? Apparently, not very much.
So how much money are they going to give this year? 80 Billion? 100 Billion? What’s the magic number?
Or maybe we need to turn back to the values and beliefs this country was founded on. You know, Christianity, God and all that jazz."
Cue the rimshot.
The anguished musings of a jack-of-all trades creative professional based out of Longwood, Florida. Find out more about him here. You know, if that's your 'thing'.
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